Redneck Computer Lingo


"Hard drive" -- Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.

"Keyboard" ---- Place to hang your truck keys.

"Window" ------ Place in the truck to hang your guns.

"Floppy" ------ When you run out of Polygrip.

"Modem" ------- How you got rid of your dandelions.

"ROM" --------- Delicious when you mix it with coca cola.

"Byte" -------- First word in a kiss-off phrase.

"Reboot" ------ What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.

"Network" ----- Activity meant to provide bait for your trout line.

"Mouse" ------- Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle in order to get a free case.

"LAN" -------- To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck."

"Cursor" ------ What some guys do when they are mad at their wife and/or girlfriend.

"bit" --------- A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon seed across the porch long ways."

"digital control" -- What yore fingers do on the TV remote.

"packet" ------ What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.


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